The Doorman

I went out to buy some fruits and a chocolate bar a couple of minutes ago. I had a little chat with the doorman in my way inside to the apartament buildings where I live.That chat made me realize something very important to my life.

Today I was feeling blue. I had weird feelings and the last time I had them was back in 2008. I don't like these feelings at all. One of the reasons I got out of my apartment to buy some chocolate was that I was trying to do something good so that I could feel a little more happier.
It was for just a couple of minutes, but that conversation I said I had with the doorman changed my mood. I really liked talking with the doorman. I like talking to people, see how they are doing, talk about weather (btw it's so freakin' cold today), and especially: I love helping people.
I love helping people that are close to me. Like, mum, dad, sister, future girlfriend and wife, my future kids and so on. BUT, I really like helping people that I've just met!
I think not talking to different people makes me sad. Today and tomorrow I won't have classes, so I will stay home a lot and I won't talk much, except thru telephone, but that's different. I think this was one of the things which was making me feel sad.
I was far away for everyone I love for 2 years and even so I was happy all the time! Why? Because I was helping and talking everyday!

I realized today that I wanna talk and help people throughout my life! I can't work in a place that I don't interact with people.
I want to work! I want to help and interact with other people. I want to work on something useful and be proud of the work I done afterwards.
Actually, I'm kind of sick of studying. I want to work. I want to live. I want to have a place I call home. I want to have a wife and go out for dinner with her. I want to have a daily routine that makes me fell alive.
Am I asking for too much?

Well, I'm working in order to have everything I want. The sad part is: My work is studying...

I think I should change the subtitle to "I want to" instead of "The Doorman".

I need to read more English, so that I can write better.